Whatever Happens In Vegas...Will Definitely Be Posted On This Blog!

My maiden voyage to Las Vegas will be in February as we booked a three-day, three-night excursion to Sin City yesterday. Using the friendly services of Expedia, we were able to get exactly what we wanted with flights and a stay right on the strip at Bill's Gambling Hall and Saloon. I know many of the people who read my blog have been to Vegas so please send along your best advice to my e-mail address: mrl21@hotmail.com.

One funny sidenote of using expedia is that we were checking flights for both Akron and Cleveland when we accidentally put in Akron to Cleveland. Can you believe the flight was more expensive than Akron to Las Vegas? Not to mention there were two layovers. Apparently there are no direct flights from Akron to Cleveland and you have a layover in Detroit and Pittsuburgh, though my guess was that the layovers were in Stow and Brecksville which seemed to make more sense geographically.

Have a Happy New Year Everyone!

Pride Won Out Over Money...Barely!

Early Sunday it became obvious that my father and I were going to lose in our fantasy football league (the league with the big payout). Actually lose is too nice of a word-we got crushed. I still had one chance left to make it into a championship game in my other league (the league with the small payout, but a lot of pride was at stake). It came down to the last minute of the Monday Night Football Game, but I won my semi-final game in my other league (the pride league) by ONE point to make it to the championship game. If you read this previous blog entry, you would know my leagues and my teams came down to pride or money last weekend. Obviously pride won out, except for one small thing: I still have a championship game to play, and I have to play it against my Julie, the Fantasy Football First-Timer. Let me say one more thing: Her team is good, really really good. Yesterday my co-worker, and blog-reader Bill said the following thing: "It would really suck to lose to your significant other in something that you really loved, and something they were only doing to entertain you." That pretty much sums up what I am feeling right now. Thanks for the insight Bill!

The World's Best Wings? I Think Not!

Last week I took a new way to work as to avoid the crazy freeway traffic that occurs before you get downtown. As I took my new route, I found a Cleats Bar and Grille at the bottom of a big hill behind the freeway with a huge sign overlooking the parking lot that said: "Home of the Worlds Best Wings". I felt like Columbus discovering America for the first time, though discovering a place that advertises "Worlds Best Wings" might be an even better feeling.

Obviously it wasn't long before we headed over there for dinner as it was only 5 minutes away, and just to remind you, they advertised "Home of the Worlds Best Wings" outside on a huge sign. We got there and were excited it wasn't wing night, so we could taste the real deal and not get stuck with the skimpy wing night wings. We were pleasantly surprised that you could get a wing platter: 30 wings with choice of five different sauces. We were sold on the platter right away. We were also sold on the Great Lakes Christmas Ale, but that is a different blog entry. We chose our five sauces: hot garlic, samurai (teriyaki), memphis belle, cajun and sweet heat. When the wings came out they were all loaded on one big platter with a bunch of fries thrown in the middle. I felt my arteries tighten up as the waitress sat down our dinner in front of us. (Keep in mind this is a place that advertises an 11-pound sandwich on their menu called the Garbage Dumpster, so you know these wings are bound to be extra-healthy!)

As for the wings, I only liked the hot garlic and cajun dry rub wings. The other three were way too sweet and not spicy enough for me. On top of only liking the two sauces, I had two wings break on me, which is an automatic deduction in my rankings. Overall, the wings had good size but could have been sauced better. It looked like they just threw sauce on top of the wings on the way out of the kitchen, so only half the wing had sauce on it. I walked away underwhelmed by the whole experience. I give the wings served at Cleats three wings out of five wings. Also, if you don't think the name Cleats sounds like a romantic place to get wings, you shouldn't judge this wing place by the athletic shoes hanging outside on their big bright neon sign. Underneath the exterior of a very casual sports bar, with minimal formalities and a bathroom that looks like it is only half-completed, they also offer this deal: A Deluxe Chicken Dinner on their menu with 24 wings and a bottle of Dom Perignon for just $150.00. Now that's a classy romantic wing joint!

'Tis The Season

It's that time of year again. I am making last-minute preparations, checking my lists twice and planning parties. Of course I can only be talking about one thing: Fantasy Football Playoffs have begun. This year I was in two leagues for the first time, and this year I am lucky enough to have made it to the semi-finals in both my leagues. As much fun and excitement that it has been to be in two leagues at one time, it has also been quite a headache: twice as much research and twice as many decisions. I know! My life is so hard! The most stressful thing (if you can call anything with the word "fantasy" in it stressful) is that many weeks I face players in one league that I have on my team in another league. I will be facing this very situation this weekend. My father and I have a chance to win a lot of money with Adrian Peterson, Edgerrin James and Joey Galloway this weekend in our semi-final game. In my other league, my opponent has these same players and the opportunity to win bragging rights in Cleveland for the next year. I am torn on money versus pride this week. Talk about stressful. I would rather try to find a parking space at the mall on Christmas Eve. Speaking of Christmas...isn't that coming up sometime soon as well?

The Browns Score! CRASH!

Yesterday my brother Mark was the responsible one. You may want to read that last sentence again before I go on. Ok...now that you are all caught up, Mark is the responsible one. This is because he was the only one able to drive home yesterday after we spent four hours at the Blue Moose Eatery watching every football game possible on the NFL ticket. We left the bar before the Browns game was over even though it looked like they had the game won. However on the drive home and two onside kicks later by the Jets, the game was still not over. It was at this point that I got out of my car and watched Mark park my car ahead of his car on the street. Unfortunately, it was also at this point that Jamal Lewis scored the game-winning touchdown for the Browns. As my brother listened to Jim Donovan's excited voice do play-by-play on the score, he accidentally slammed his foot on the gas and backed up into his own car. At this point his alarm starts going off on his car. While there was very minimal damage for either car, it did create quite a commotion. I guess that was just Mark's way of celebrating. Let me reiterate, he is the responsible one in this story.

The Amazingly Cold Casting Call

On Tuesday my sister and I waited for four hours out in twenty degree weather for our chance to get an audition for The Amazing Race reality show. Let me just say, it took me almost 24 hours to regain full feeling in my extremities, but it was worth it. After doing a quasi-Amazing Race adventure in Dave and Busters, we were chosen to do a video that would be sent to the casting offices of the show. I will keep everyone updated. Keep your fingers crossed!

The Amazing (Blog) Race

Tomorrow at this time, my sister and I will be auditioning for The Amazing Race, which is one of our favorite shows. If things go well, at this time next year, you will be watching us adventure across the globe. As always, I will keep you updated.

I Have The NFL Network And I Bet You Don't!

There is a huge uproar in the sports world today regarding the NFL Network and tonight's Packers/Cowboys game. If you are like most people in this country, you won't be able to watch one of the biggest games of the season. To go into the logistics of why the cable companies won't purchase the NFL network you may want to read this article. Obviously it comes down to money, though that doesnt really help the millions of people who won't be able to catch this game tonight. Fortunately I am not one of those people. I have the NFL Network.

I actually stumbled upon the NFL Network a few months ago by accident before I even moved in with Julie. There I was flipping through her channels and there it was, and I just kept saying: "You have the NFL Network? You have the NFL Network? YOU HAVE THE NFL NETWORK!!" As you can see I was extremely happy, though trying to explain the importance of this find to someone who never really watched sports before I came along was a bit tough. I tried to explain that there would be games on that would not be shown on regular television this football season, and what a beautiful thing it would be once the season started. Each day after I found the channel, I would go to it just to make sure it was still there. Now my patience has paid off. On Thanksgiving day when people were coming down from their Turkey and football high of watching TWO games, I switched on the NFL network to catch the Colts play the Falcons that night for my THIRD game of the day. Tonight I am obviously going to catch the Packers/Cowboys game, and then hopefully in week 17, I am going to watch the Patriots make history against the Giants as they try and go undefeated.

I actually thought I was going to have to miss the game tonight because of a really cool event at Cleveland Public Theatre, but then I realized we weren't going until Friday. When I thought I was missing this game, Julie said we could TiVo it. However I said: "No way! You can't TiVo a game on the NFL Network!" I might as well just be watching highlights with the common folk who have cable. No, if I am watching a game on the NFL Network I want to be watching it live, so I can call people and tease them about the game. Julie really does have a lot to learn about football, but it last she has the NFL Network and now that I am all moved it, so do I!

Moving Thoughts...

As I stood there this weekend with my hands full of boxes and furniture, I stared at my emptying apartment and thought the following things: 1) Why didn't I make the back room my bedroom 2) Why didn't I open up the living room more 3) Why didn't I put my couch in the other corner of my living room 4) Is it too late to pull all of the stuff out of the truck just to see how that would have looked. The answer to that last one by the looks on my helpers faces would have been a resounding "YES!' by the way.

The Seven-Day Wagon

I hope everyone had a safe and wonderful holiday weekend. My weekend was packed full of wonderful Thanksgiving food, moving furniture, the best wings I have ever had in Cleveland, traveling to Detroit to see a concert and of course Sunday football events.

A day after stuffing ourselves with Turkey and stuffing, we worked up another appetite from moving furniture and decided to get wings at the Winking Lizard in Independence. These were the best wings I have ever had at any Winking Lizard. I always recommend that you DONT get their wings on wing night and we were happy to go there on a Friday night with no wing specials in sight. The wings were big, juicy and piping hot covered in our favorite sacues: hot garlic and cajun. They recieved 4.5 wings out of 5 on my scale. I don't know if this is truly the case or not but there was a great football game on the television and the beer tasted extra good on this day, so perhaps the beer and football also made the wings taste better. Speaking of beer...

My doctor put me on a prescription where I can not drink at all. I have not started taking it yet. I just picked it up last night and now I have to decide on a seven-day window where I will not want to drink or the opportunity will not present itself (ahem). I have two friends with birthdays this week and an open bar on Friday night after a play I am attending. Saturday and Sunday is football. Hmmm...this could be a tough decision. I wonder if I can double up on dosage and just take it for 3.5 days. This reminds me of my friend Mindy trying to decide on a good time to get pregnant. Obviously the holidays will never work and the summer is a bad time to stop drinking. I always have to remind her that it is impossible to go through the whole process in less than four months. Though if anyone can do it, it is definitely Mindy.

Pub Crawl Slideshow

I was told some people were unable to see the pics I tried to post last week from my pub crawl. I decided to go ahead and add the slide show so that you could see all the revelry up close. Enjoy and have a great Thanksgiving weekend.

X-Mas Aled Up (Pub Crawl Blog)

Yesterday my sister came up with a saying to describe my whole weekend. To be "X-Mas Aled Up" is a term she coined after seeing the effects on a person after having one of these beers. Every fall Great Lakes Brewing Company makes their infamous Christmas Ale and releases it for only four months a year. I can only assume this is for safety reasons. This beer does crazy things to people. It's not a normal beer. It's like a super beer.

People run out to get this beer like it's a drug and usually regret it the next day. I have been able to hold myself to only two a night in most situations and usually this is too many. On my pub crawl this past weekend, I waited until my fifth bar out of nine to have my one and only Christmas Ale, and even this was not a good idea. As I look back, it was at this bar where things started going a little awry or shall I say blurry. The next day I tempted fate and drank another one, which led to me hitting my head on my couch (see picture).

As for the pub crawl: I don't think I have ever had so much fun with friends and family. As you can see from the pictures at this link, it was a good time for everybody-even people who didn't know me. By the end we just handed the extra t-shirts out and people all around Ohio City knew my name. I am now looking forward to my "Getting Acquainted with Old Brooklyn" Pub Crawl, but I think I will wait til the Spring so I am not tempted by the Christmas Ale!

The Curse Of Cleveland Is Over

Just in case fans of Clevleand have not heard yet, the curse is over. We finally won the big one! This past Sunday on the Food Network's "The Next Iron Chef," Michael Symon, owner of two Cleveland restaurants, Lola and Lolita won the battle to become the next Iron Chef on "Iron Chef America." If you don't watch the Food Network or have never heard of Iron Chef America, this may mean very little to you. However, if you like Cleveland as much as I do, you have to at least appreciate the prominence this brings to the city.

Most people who live downtown know that Symon owns two of the coolest eating joints around. Origianally located in Tremont, Lola is now located downtown and Lolita has taken the Tremont location. While the food is phenomonal at both these locations, Lolita has one of the coolest happy hours around. Where else can you get happy hour prices from 10 pm until close on Friday AND Saturday nights that include items from the award-winning menu and drink specials. This weekend I went to the Food and Wine show in Cleveland and Symon was listed under "local celebrity chef." Next year when I go to this show, I will be excited to see his name under "national celebrity chef." Now if only the Browns can win the big one, and by that I mean...beating the Steelers!

Come One, Come All...

...To my Ohio City Pub Crawl. Join me this Saturday as I bar hop through Ohio City for the last time before moving to Old Brooklyn (that's Cleveland not Parma by the way). We will be leaving the Old Angle at 6:30 pm and stopping at seven or eight bars (weather permitting) before coming back to the Old Angle to finish the night. There will also be t-shirts designed by Tim for a very small price to wear along the way to make it worth your while. I hope to see you there!

Who Jokes About Wings?

Today as I was talking to my father on the phone, I told him I was about to take my Wingmaster exam. He completely thought I was joking. He thought I made the whole wingmaster title and site up. After completing the exam and receving this response just a few short minutes ago, I can assure all of my readers this sight and my exam are no joke:

Sportygrrl,

Thank you for your swift response, I am happy to report that you were the first person to get 9 out of 10 correct and if you check the site, TheWingmasters.com has bestowed the supreme status of Wingmaster upon you - Congratulations!!!

We are very impressed with your answers; the only one you got incorrect was a tricky question. We know you are extremely deserving of this title because you got the one question that almost everyone gets wrong correct; the average size of a chicken wing. This is not an easy question and you must eat and know wings to answer it correctly because it is not noted anywhere. We arrived at the answer based on a review and measuring of 250 wings over a two week period, at various locations.

What's also impressive is that you were right on with the wing sauce question, and you took the proper approach to looking at the question - this was our other trick question. Great job and welcome to the League of Wingmasters...

Who's joking now? Ok, ok... it IS a little funny.

Breaking News!

This just in from every major news source in the world: "Keeping slim is one of the best ways of preventing cancer, as is avoiding excessive amounts of red meat and wine, a landmark study has revealed." On Wednesday when this study was announced, I couldn't get away from it. It was on every major news website, and as I worked out that night, it was on almost every television at the gym. Is this really huge news? Who didn't know this? Was there someone out there trying to beat cancer by binge drinking, eating a lot of steak and not exercising, and if so...has that been working? I think my favorite finding of this earth-shattering study is this: "If people must drink, the report said, they should limit their intake to two units a day for a man or one for a woman. A unit is a half pint of beer or a small glass of wine." A half-pint of beer for a woman? Can you actually go to a bar and order a half-pint? I just hope this finding doesn't create longer lines at my gym. Though on the other hand, it might create shorter lines at the bar.

In related news, we tried a new wing place this week called Roosters. We spotted this restaurant last weekend driving through Parma, and vowed to return as they advertised wings on their big bright sign. This was an interesting place because it was a sports bar, but it was really really bright and seemed more family-oriented than anything. The wings were huge, BUT they were breaded and I don't like breaded wings because they take away the crispiness. We ordered extra hot (which they call Donkey for some reason), garlic and teriyaki. The hot wings were unimpressive, but the garlic was very good as was the teriyaki. If you can get past the breading, the wings were fresh, juicy and very filling, but if your claim to fame is wings and you can't make a good hot sauce, I cant possibly award you more than 3.5 wings out of 5. I highly recommend these wings with a good half pint of your favorite beer.

It's Been A Long Two Weeks

The last two weeks have been a whirlwind of fun (except the part where the Indians choked to the Red Sox). My birthday week was filled with fun adventures including the opportunity to meet one of my favorite writers, comedians and actresses, Amy Sedaris. A couple days later I went on my birthday goal bike ride from my house to my friend's house in Chagrin Falls (20 miles), and then spent the rest of the day at the Winking Lizard in Bedford, which is a lot more fun than it might sound. Apparently at the Winking Lizard you get a free birthday shot called "The Blowjob" which creates for good photo opportunities, but the taste was too sweet for me. We also taste tested the new wing sauces (spicy seasme and garlic parmesean) they are offering which got a four out of five wings ranking from me.

On my actual birthday we went to Niagara Falls. Before heading to Canada, we stopped in Buffalo for some recommended wings at Gabriel's Gate that were really good (four out of five wings). We had an amazing time in Niagara Falls and got a beautiful room overlooking the Falls at the Marriott. It was a great trip, but Canada is just so damn expensive that it makes it hard to go there anymore. Remember when the American dollar was actually worth something?

Halloween was this past weekend and I decided to do it up this year. I went as Captain Cock Block (Julie went as Q-Bert). For those of you that don't know what a cock block is, here is the definition according to Urban Dictionary: "An act of ill etiquette in which a male is speaking to one female in a group of females, and the alpha female creates a disruptive environment" Now just imagine that in human form, or just check out the slideshow below.

The Difference Between 31 and 32 is 40!

I was able to reach my goal of losing forty pounds by my birthday! Complete details of the best birthday weekend ever will follow later in the week!

Birthday Card Rating System

This birthday card from my sister and Julie gets five wings out of five wings:

Dear Mom and Dad:

Greetings from Cleveland! I hope the weather is lovely for your month-long vacation in South Carolina. It's great that you have all this free time to travel now. However after sitting on the beach for almost a month, you need to come home and cheer on the Indians. Not sure if you have heard or not, but they are one game away from the World Series. I know you are having a great time as you never answer your phones anymore when I try to call you, but you are missing a lot of excitement back home in Cleveland! (You may not answer my calls, but I at least know you read my blog.)

First Time Fantasy Footballer Part 2

In just under seven weeks, the first time fantasy footballer has gone from asking me what the position abbreviations are in football (QB, WR, RB, etc...) to sending me this message this morning: "Calvin Johnson is dead weight. I am going to pick up somebody else." On top of that she has more wins than me this season in our fantasy football league. As a matter of fact, the three last place teams in my league are the ones who I thought would have the most wins, and we have a combined record of 3-14-1. We are losing to people who don't know how the game is scored, and don't take people out on bye weeks. Last week I lost to the woman in first place, who hasn't made a roster change all year and only had six players playing in the game compared to my ten players. Now that's embarrassing. If this continues, I may have to step down as commissioner of this fantasy football league and let someone who doesn't know anything about football take over the reins.

Moose Wings

A friend recommended The Blue Moose Eatery in Parma for their wings. Once she said they had 41 different flavors to choose from, I was there. Though that advertising is false because three of the flavors were crossed off of the menu, so technically they only had 38 flavors to choose from. I like to make sure my readers get the true story!

The Blue Moose Eatery is a huge huge bar. There is a gigantic outside bar which looks like something right out of a Spring Break disaster story, and then the inside is like two sports bars put together. On this particular day, three hours after the Buckeyes had played and three hours before the Indians game, we were two of only five people in the place, so we knew the wings should at least be fresh. We ordered their top three recommended sauces: Triv Taco Tonka, Southern Belle and Billy Bob Cajun, and then we went with the default Hot Buffalo just to see how spicy it was. While the Southern Belle was not my favorite, it definitely had the most flavor. I preferred the Billy Bob Cajun because of the heat. The waitress who gave us excellent service, and I don't think that was just because we were the only ones eating there, seemed disppointed that we didn't like the Triv Taco Tonka as much as everyone else. It was a good sauce, but not good enough to be number one..for us at least. I think we are pickier than most palates in Parma.

Overall I give this place three wings out of five. Even though there were a lot of sauce choices, there wasn't a lot of sauce on the wings, which were inconsistently sized. However outside of the wings, the service was great and the bar was an awesome place to catch a game. After this rating, I am now officially a black belt on The Wingmasters site. They e-mailed me today to let me know my t-shirt is on the way.

All I Need In Life Is Free Alcohol And A Good Bike Trail

What a great weekend! We spent Friday night on a quest for free alcohol and were not disappointed. We went to the grand opening of an alternative bookstore near Ohio City called Suspect Thoughts that was serving free wine and cheese. After welcoming the new owners to Cleveland and sharing in some fine spirits, we were off to the Art Walk in Tremont. Asterisk Gallery was our destination because they were having an art opening for Arabella Proffer. We got there so late, they were already out of wine, but the owner of Asterisk, Dana DePew let us tap into his personal stash of Natural Light. Talk about a classy art opening when you get to pose in front of the art with your Natural Light in a can (Tim and I pictured). We finished the evening at The Flying Monkey, where they had the nerve to charge us for drinks, though I was able to talk Dana into giving me his swanky jacket because I loved it that much, so I was still able to score more free stuff.

The weekend turned out to be incredible. The Browns won, the Indians took a game from Boston, my fantasy football teams won, I became a wingmaster black belt, and my sister introduced us to a really beautiful biking trail in Boston Mills. My sister, Julie and I biked through Boston Mills into Hudson and turned around in Stow to complete an 18-mile biking trip. The only thing that would have made it better would have been if the Summit County MetroParks served free wine. (Pictured is my sister and I posing on the trail)

The Wingmaster Cometh

I have stumbled upon a website that is going to change my life. The page is called TheWingmasters.com, and the purpose of the page is to bring together people who rate wings. Individuals go through what is called Wing Kwon Do training to become an official wingmaster on this site. You earn different points for different ratings and recommendations, and eventually climb your way up to the wingmaster level. Along the way you earn different colored belts as you acquire more points. I am currently halfway to becoming a wingmaster and have a blue belt. On this site, they rate their wings on a scale of five wings; therefore I will be changing the structure of my wing ratings to be based on a five wings to keep everything consistent in my ratings. I do believe I have now found my true calling in life. Mom and Dad if you are reading this, I can't imagine how proud you must be!

Not Only Was He White, He Was Also Chubby

As you many know by now there was a school shooting in Cleveland yesterday approximately one mile from my job. When I first heard about the shootings, I couldn't get over the fact that this shooting took place in an urban high school. These kinds of school shootings don't happen in the big city. They happen in the rich suburbs. With all the footage shown, one was made to believe that the shooter was black, which shocked the hell out of me because these kind of shootings aren't done by black kids. They are done by crazy white kids. As I watched more and more footage, I still was in shock...until this morning when Julie sent me these pictures and I saw that he was indeed a white student. A very messed up kid if you read over this page and believe that it is really him, though apparently that is not his real picture. I know it's not his real picture becasuse of this future pulitzer prize-winning journalism that gave me more insight into this kid's mind courtesy of cleveland.com: "Asa, who was 14-years-old and is known to have argued with fellow students over religion, was a chubby teen."

Finally! Biking, Camping and Rafting Pictures

In 1492, The Swoosh Was Invented

As a government employee, I get Columbus Day off. While having the day off is great, I have a sense of social responsibility, and I have always felt a little guilty celebrating this holiday. However, now that Nike has come up with a pair of shoes designed specifically for Native Americans, I can breathe easier tomorrow as I sleep in. Thanks Nike!

Witness The Backlash

In case you haven't heard, Lebron James wore a New York Yankees hat to last night's playoff game between the Cleveland Indians and the Yankees. I do believe my love affair with this man is over. His cockiness has exceeded all bounds especially when it comes to supporting the people and town that support him. The more I think about it, the more infuriated I get about the whole thing. This might blow over by the CAVS first game on November 15, but it feels like this Cleveland sports fan has been slapped in the face. When someone brought it up this morning in my office, I promptly got up and ripped down my LeBron poster, balled it up and threw it away (pictured).

Ahhh...Civilization

We made it back to civilization yesterday after four days in the woods of Pennsylvania. All told we biked almost 20 miles along the Youghiogeny River and then whitewater rafted 8 miles through the river. It was the most beautiful place I have ever seen. Our campsite (pictured) was secluded which was nice, but that also meant we walked miles and miles in that timespan UP to the bathrooms. Pictures are on their way and we got some great ones. Along with the recreational adventures, we had wings at the Falls City Pub after rafting that got a four wing out of four wing rating.

The Falls City Pub was one of the reasons we chose the rafting company Wilderness Voyageurs. We saw the company was located right next to the pub online before we made our reservations. After spending five hours rafting on Saturday we headed to the pub for some much needed food and beverages of the adult variety to share with some of our new friends, including our river guide (pictured). While the pub looked like a hole in the wall when you walked in, they only had top shelf liquor and any kind of beer you can imagine inlcuding some from Cleveland's Great Lakes Brewery. Those rafters know how to drink. And Cook! We ordered the house wings and they were crispy yet juicy. The sauce had so much flavor: sweet, spicy and tangy all in one. The people we were dining with got the garlic butter and hot wings, which were also exceptional. Perhpas it was the endorphins from rafting, but these were the best wings I have had in a long time.

Other than wings, we also cooked at our campsite. Along with the obligatory hot dog meal, we changed things up a little bit. We took porterhouse steak which we marninated in a pear champagne vinagrette with gorgonzola and garlic. We served it up with potatoes covered in mushrooms and onions sauteed in a garlic butter. On Friday we made turkey breast we had marinated in buffalo hot sauce along with vegetables and baked potato. We also scrambled up omlettes and made nachos over the fire. We worked hard to spoil ourselves including an air mattress that we had to manually pump using a foot pump because we had no electricity. That process took over an hour, but was worth it considering how cold and hard the ground was each morning. Overall it was a wonderful trip, but I was ready to come home and take a hot shower and lie in a warm bed. I didn't catch the Browns game on television, but thanks to my satellite radio, I was able to catch most of the action. I felt just like the early pioneers most of the time minus the wings, air mattress and satellite radio. They must have really had it rough without those things!

Self-Service Wings

Let me just say before I begin this wing rating entry that the whole ranking thing is starting to catch on. The other day my sister and her Julie called me to tell me they had given a 4-wing rating to some bread pudding they ate at Sushi Rock. Feel free to use the rating system for any and all things.

On Monday we traveled to Bedford, Ohio to eat at the Wing House. A student of mine told me they were known for their wings. With a name like that, it's hard to believe, but I bought her story anyway. When we found the place on Miles Road we noticed it was right next to the Crazy Horse Strip Club, so automatically the ambiance of the place got 4 wings. Upon entering we were told everythng is self-serve, meaning that you walk up to the bar and order and you walk up to the window and order your food. When I first heard this, I was hoping we could also pour our own drinks, but that didn't seem like an option after I asked the bartender.

We walked up to the window and ordered: hot, hot garlic, cajun dry and kung fu, which was essentially teriyaki, but the name sold us. The wings came out quickly and they were hot and juicy. The hot and hot garlic werent very spicy, but they had a lot of flavor. The cajun dry were really good, though one of them did break in half, and Julie said that should be an automatic half wing deducation. I agree as well. The teriyaki was really good, but not the best I have had. There was plenty of celery, but the blue cheese had a mayonnaise taste to it, so I passed on that. Overall, with the ambiance, the ability to self-serv, the freshness of almost all the wings, along with the old married men dancing with the younger women at the pool table, I will have to give this experience a rating of three wings out of four and that includes the half wing deduction for the broken wing.

I know it's only Wednesday, but I hope everyone has a great weekend! I am off to go camping, biking and whitewater rafting in Southwestern Pennsylvania for three days. I will be back just in time for kickoff on Sunday.

This Is How I Roll

Sunday was so beautiful outside it would have been a sin to stay in all day watching football and drinking beer. Instead of doing my normal Sunday routine, Julie and I headed out on a 25-mile biking adventure through Lakewood, Rocky River, North Olmstead, Strongsville, Middleburg Heights and Parma. Part of the plan was to stop at the Nature Center in North Olmsted, because it is along our route, and I have heard great things about the view. On this particular day the center was hosting a settlers celebration/fall festival, so along with the view we also got to enjoy banjo music and fresh apple cider made right before our eyes. As we headed through Strongsville we stopped and enjoyed the picnic we had packed before finishing the final leg of our trip through Parma. We got home just in time for the Browns game AND THEN I was able to watch football and drink beer. I have included pictures to show how beautiful these trails are throughout the West and South side of Cleveland.

Why I Love Weekends By Sportygrrl

I was going to blog today about how it would be hard to top the greatness that was last weekend. I then realized I have been so busy this week that I am yet to blog about last weekend. In a nutshell, I had an incredible time with Roz on Friday night, woke up Saturday and went to my nephew's football game, spent an insane amount of time and money at Trader Joes, met my sister and Julie for drinks at the Wine Bar in Ohio City, then we attended the party of the year in Cleveland compliments of Mindy, woke up early on Sunday and made baby back ribs while watching the Browns play an incredible game of football, and capped off the weekend on Sunday Evening when my father and I broke the record for most points scored in one week in our fantasy football league.

As for the event on Saturday night, it would be a tragic if I didn't describe it in more detail. Every year, Cleveland Public Theatre throws a party called Pandemonium, which is the perfect name for this event. It is an evening of on-going comedy, music and theatrical events spread all over the campus of this west-side theatre. It also includes food from restaurants all over Clevleand and an open bar. Most people pay $100 to get in, which is why it is called a benefit, however we are lucky enough to have Mindy let us come to events like this for free. Even if I can't get in next year for free, I am going anyway. It is easily worth the price of admission.

As you can see, it will be hard to top last weekend, but this weekend is shaping up to be a lot of fun as well. I am heading to the Indians game tonight as they are about to clinch the Central Divsion. Tomorrow after biking we are going to a clambake before heading to the Roller Derby Championship bout. It's hard to say what could end up happening after Roller Derby, it's usually an adventure. On Sunday, I am going to TiVO the football games, so we can bike all of our favorite metropark bike paths before the nice weather is over. We are going to start on the Lakewood trail off of Detroit Road, head into Strongsville and then take on the Parma trail which will be about a 25-mile bike ride by the time we are finished. Yes, you read that right...I am recording football to go biking on Sunday.

Next weekend we are going on a 3-day camping/biking/canoeing trip, so both of these weekends could get trumped. Yes, you read that right...I am going camping. Wow, my life has really changed.

Goodbye Frye!

Early reports this morning from my friend Staci, a very reliable source, say that the Browns have traded quarterback Charlie Frye to the Seattle Seahawks for a sixth round pick. Keep in mind she told me this two hours before it was reported on cleveland.com. Apparently I have contacts that rival Deepthroat from the Watergate Era.

My only question now is: Why does he get to leave? After his performance on Sunday he should be made to stay here and watch every game this season just like the rest of us. After playing the worst game of his life, he is now on a playoff team. The only logical reason I could think of is that because he is from Ohio, they found the farthest destination they possibly could as punishment.

First-Time Fantasy Footballer

Julie is playing fantasy football for the first time. Actually she is watching football for the first time, so it is a lot for her to take in. I find her questions endearing, and will blog them as they come up throughout the season.

September 9, 2007:
"Do they get extra points for end-zone dances?"

Bike The Trail, Ride The Rail

I didn't come up with that title on my own. All the credit goes to the Cuyahoga Valley Scenic Railroad. This company lets you bike the towpath and then you can jump on the train for $2 and head back in the direction in which you came. This is exactly what we did on Saturday when we headed south to Peninsula and parked at the Winking Lizard (foreshadowing), so that we could jump on the towpath. From there we biked north over 15 miles to Independence and paid our two dollars to jump on the train and head back to Peninsula. It was the coolest trail we have ever biked on, but it was also the hardest trail because it was a dirt path.

After biking and being dropped off right back at the Winking Lizard we had to have wings. The Winking Lizard in Peninsula has an interesting exterior because it has held on to the origianl sign showing there used to be a nite club in that spot. We ordered a dozen spicy garlic and a dozen caribbean wings. All the wings were the largest we have gotten at any restaurant and the spicy garlic were juicy and spicy, however the caribbean wings were lacking in sauce. Overall I would give the wings three wings out of four. Unfortunately two of our wings broke, which usually means that wings aren't very fresh. In this case, the new advertising in Peninsula could be: bike the trail, ride the rail and eat wings that are stale.

It's Hard To Be A Browns Fan

Sunday started out great. It was the first week of football, so how could it not be great? My dad showed up so we could head up to the Browns game. Before the game we were going to go to the Old Angle, but it was closed. We ended up just buying sandwiches at the store and went back to my place to wait for our taxi. After an hour, the taxi never showed up. We decided to start walking toward the stadium about five minutes before kickoff. After walking over a mile, which included my ticket falling out of my pocket on Superior Bridge, we finally flagged down a taxi and got to our seat halfway through the first quarter. This was just in time to watch the Steelers crush the Browns. We left at the end of the third quarter with the game well over, but the weather was just starting up. My brother Bob was nice enough to give us a ride home, but he was parked about a mile away. This is when the rain started. By the time we got to the car, we were drenched. It was a rough opening day for me, but my fantasy team has a great chance to win. That will probably be my last Browns game of the season. I like my fantasy world much better!

Father Of The Year Award

The father of the year award goes to my brother David, who gave up his home opener Browns-Steelers tickets to go to his son's sporting event. His love for his son is my gain. I will be at the game instead of him. I am so excited for football season starting as you can tell from my picture, where I opened a bottle of champagne during the first game of the season last night.

Lieberth Go Fish

As I was going out tonight, I went down to Mark's apartment to check in with him. The following conversation took place:
Mark: "Do you have any toilet paper?"
Me: "Damn! I was hoping you did."
Mark: "Damn!"

After spending a couple hours out with Mindy, and then me chilling out at home, Mark and I had the following text messaging conversation, because apparently at this point, we are too lazy to actually walk stairs:
Me: "I've got beer, what do you have?"
Mark: "Booze and toilet paper."
Me: "Nice! Wanna share?"
Mark: "Sure."
Me: "Yay!"

Thats how you play Lieberth Go Fish.

The Carnivorous Carnie

I went to the Geauga County Fair on Saturday night and ate like there was no tomorrow. It's amazing what happens to people when they walk through those fair gates with the smell of onion rings, elephant ears, gyros and sausage coming at them. I don't even like sweets and I have tried to give up all fatty foods, but all of that went out the window when that smell hit me. Just to illustrate the gluttony of it all, picture this: I had just finished a gryo, and then was standing in line waiting for a funnel cake as I was sharing "the world's largest corn dog." This was all after I had the wings. Like a moth to light, I can always find wings and I couldn't pass up this opportunity to rate fair wings, which in this case were much better than fair. I ordered up a half dozen hot wings and they did not disappoint. While it is too late for any of you to drive to Burton, Ohio to get these wings at the fair that has now left town, I would highly recommend it if you still could. The wings were crunchy on the outside yet juicy on the inside and perfectly seasoned. They were spicy, fresh and cheap and the best part is that I got them at a fair. I would rank these wings with three and a half wings out of four.

The Summer of Drinking Smart

Back in early June my friend Alison won a free happy hour party at The Garage Bar. Part of the prize included a bunch of free alcohol-related stuff, such as wristbands, t-shirts and a hat. In particular, a Jim Beam racing hat. Because the party was outside and my face was getting burnt, I decided to snag the hat and wear it for the rest of the night, and the rest of the summer for that matter. The best part of the hat is that it has the words: Drink Smart in tiny letters on the side. When I noticed that I declared the Summer of 2007 The Summer of Drinking Smart. As Labor Day approaches I decided to create a slideshow to reflect back on my summer of drinking smart. (Slideshow courtesy of Alison, Julie, Mindy, Roz and anyone else I hung out with in this hat)

Fantasy Football Trumps Wings

Last week I went out for wings and beer to celebrate losing thirty pounds. I love irony like that. Last night, however I decided to make a healthier "wing" to calm my wing craving. I grilled turkey breasts and threw them in a homemade wing sauce I created, which was extra spicy and extra garlicy-better than any sauce I have had eating out and less fattening as well. I still had a beer with them because you can't completely cut yourself off from the whole wing experience. While the "wings" were healthy and the sauce was mouth-watering, they didn't have the full wing crunch that you get with fried things-go figure. I would have to give myself three and a quarter wings out of four for last night's healthy wing dinner.

As many of you may know, I have a certain penchant for fantasy football, and with my draft being tomorrow night, I am getting excited. While eating "wings" last night, Julie asked me how fantasy football works. You can imagine how my eyes lit up when someone actually wanted me to describe one of my favorite passions. As I started talking about the draft process and how everyone chooses their players, I actually pushed my wings aside so I could use my hands to talk. At this point, she said: "Whoa! Fantasy football must be pretty serious if you are pushing your wings aside." For those of you scoring at home: I do love wings (of any variety), but I love fantasy football more.

Public Service Announcement

I got an e-mail with the following DUI checkpoints in Cleveland for the rest of the summer. I have decided to post them because you can never be too careful. The one on Friday, August 31st on West 25th is only a block from my house. I was thinking of bringing a lawn chair and heckling people. Perhaps I will even go to each one and make t-shirts like a concert tour. Nonetheless, drive safely Clevelanders!

Friday, August 24:
1. Mayfield / I-271 - The briefing will begin at 10 p.m. at the South Euclid sobriety checkpoint at 4130 Mayfield Road; five police departments will be working the detail.--
2. Euclid Ave. - The briefing will begin at 11 p.m. on E. 185th at Neff; three police departments will be working the detail.Saturday, August 25--
3. Columbia Road - The briefing will begin at 11 p.m. at the Olmsted Falls sobriety checkpoint on Columbia Road one mile south of I-480; eight police departments will be working the detail.--
4. Lorain / I-90 - The briefing will begin at 10 p.m. on Lorain at W. 150th; five police departments will be working the detail.Friday,

Friday, August 31:
1. Royalton Road - The briefing will begin at 10 p.m. at the North Royalton sobriety checkpoint on Royalton Road at Abbey; five police departments will be working the detail.--
2. US 42 / SR 3 - The briefing will begin at 11 p.m. at W. 25th at Franklin; five police departments will be working the detail.

Saturday, September 1:
1. Mayfield Road / I-271 - The briefing will begin at 10 p.m. at the Lyndhurst sobriety checkpoint on Mayfield Road.; five police departments will be working the detail.--
2. E. 185th / SR 2 / Euclid Ave. - The briefing will begin at 11 p.m. at the Euclid sobriety checkpoint (location TBD); two police departments will be working the detail.

Lions And Biking And Wings...Oh My!

I did enough on Saturday for three blog entries, but I will try to fit it all in this one entry. I woke up to a beautiful Saturday morning knowing I wanted a new bike. I debated and debated buying a new bike, but it made sense to me to invest in my new hobby. I ended up buying a gorgeous bike at Spin in Lakewood. I even got to test drive it before I bought it. I think I spent more time with this decision than I did when I bought my last car. I took my new bike to the North Coast Inland Trail, which is an old railway that has been paved over for biking. We started the trail in Oberlin and went about 12 miles. The trail is fascinating because some of the railway markers are still standing (see picture with marker and my NEW bike).

After biking, I decided to treat myself to wings for the first time in a month. That's right...I haven't eaten wings in a month. This along with the biking would explain my weight loss this summer. I thought about going to Winking Lizard because I know what I like there, but I have already rated their wings, so I branched out to the Parma Tavern. I was unsure of what to expect from this establishment because I have never been there. The tavern had over ten televisions showing the Browns game with a full house watching the game. I thought it would take awhile to get our wings, but they came out quickly. We ordered the following flavors: Teriyaki, Hot Buffalo, Cajun and Garlic. I was impressed by how fresh the wings tasted, but the sauce was lacking as well as the spice. They did serve the best teriyaki wings I have ever tasted though. Overall the wings had great taste but not enough spice; the blue cheese was watery, but the beer was cheap. Considering all of these things, I would give the Parma Tavern three wings out of four.

Finally I would be remiss if I didn't mention the performance of Brady Quinn against the Detroit Lions. Yes, he played well against scrubs from Detroit in the fourth quarter, but Detroit's starting defense isn't all that good to begin with, so I am taking it all with a grain of salt. It was exciting and this town needs some excitement in a quarterback. I look forward to see what he can do next week against Denver. I also look forward to Bernie Kosar's commentary. He is the worst commentator in the history of sports. The man sounds like he just left a wedding reception with a great open bar. As a matter of fact, I am starting the Bernie Kosar commentating drinking game. It goes like this:

1. Bernie stops mid-sentence: take one drink
2. Bernie mentions the word "quarterback" for no reason at all: take two drinks
3. Bernie acts like he just woke up and just blurts something out: take three drinks
4. Bernie slurs every word in his sentence: All drink!

As you can see, it was a great Saturday, which might explain why I was so tired on Sunday.

Helmet Addendum

I bought a new helmet for my city biking adventures. Yesterday as I was walking through the house, I was wearing my helmet before I got ready to go biking. I went to close my bathroom window and hit my head on the wall, as I always do, but this time there was no pain. There was only the sound of my helmet against the wall. I then decided I should probably wear the helmet full-time. I would feel a lot safer not only biking around downtown Cleveland, but also walking around my apartment in Ohio City.

Bad Religion

Yesterday I participated in an Ohio City Biking Scavenger Hunt. To say I was excited about this event puts it mildly. I have been biking almost 45 miles a week this summer, and on top of that I live in Ohio City, so I thought I had a good chance to win the $100 dollar prize. I even bought a new bike helmet to wear for the event.

We got our list of things to find five minutes before we took off and then the race was on. Things started out well as we captured the Franklin Castle on our camera phones, and then we were on our way to Church Street to captue the St. Johns Episcopal Church followed by a bed and breakfast, the Glass Blowing store, a mansion and made our way to Monroe Street to get a picture of the cemetary. We biked quickly back to the finishing point and realized we were the first ones there. As I showed my pictures for proof, I quickly realized my picture of the church didn't save. I immediately jumped back on my bike and went as fast as I could for a mile and a half to get another picture of the church. I made it back completely out of breath and found out that we had finished in second place. Instead of collecting the money prize, I found myself holding a ten dollar gift certificate to a local coffee shop. I was in disbelief. I have since found the humor in the fact that the one picture that didn't save was a picture of a church on a Sunday morning. I wonder if this was a sign that I should get to church more often.

Yum! Crow Tastes Good!

I was mistaken. There is indeed a bed and breakfast in Barberton, Ohio and I was there on Sunday to make sure for myself. Sure...I had to be lured by the smell of Barberton Chicken, but I ended up at the CasaBella Bed and Breakfast that sits right next to the lake. It was a beautiful place and a wonderful getaway spot, but just keep in mind you are getting away to Barberton, and once you are done bowling and eating chicken, there isn't a whole lot left to do.

Just Like Mapquest

Many of you may be aware that Cleveland was flooded yesterday. My direct route home and the route of many other people in the area was filled with water, up to two feet of water in many places. My office let out at 4:30 because the electricity went out in my building, and I was excited to get home early. Normally if I am let out at this time, I get home by 4:45. This is one of the advantages of living downtown. One of the disadvantages of living downtown is that it floods when we get a storm like we got yesterday. Instead of getting home at 4:45, I pulled in my driveway at 6:30. As I sat in traffic, I dialed up my inner Mapquest and came up with the following route.

1. Get on the Shoreway like you normally would to head West toward Lakewood.

2. Sit still in traffic for 40 minutes.

3. Drive on the side of the road to the lane you usually get in to exit onto 2 West.

4. See the exit for 2 West (as pictured) is flooded and head back three lanes to get onto 90 East. 5. Drive through the flooded lane until you get on higher ground.

6. Get on 90 East and call Roz and say “I’m home free!” until you realize that all the exits on 90 East are also flooded, and there is no way to turn around in either direction because of the traffic jam.

7. Jump onto 271 South and get off to go to the bathroom at the McDonalds in Willoughby because of the iced coffee you drank before you left work.

8. Sit in traffic with all the other people who live in the East suburbs.

9. Take the exit for 480 West and head to the State Road exit which puts you Southwest of the city.

10. Get off at State Road and head home.

11. Don’t forget to have a small panic attack every time you are stuck on a bridge or under a bridge because of what happened in Minneapolis yesterday.

Once I got home, I jumped on my bike and went down to Lake Erie, which was quite calm. I can only assume this is because half of it was sitting over on the Shoreway.

Biker's Guilt

I have come up with a new phrase: Biker's Guilt. This is the guilt you have once you realize you are not going to go out biking, even though you probably should because it's a nice day. When I got home from work on Wednesday it was raining. I knew I wouldn't be able to bike, so I instead decided to have a couple beers, which I believe is the healthy alternative to biking. After a couple beers, it cleared up outside. I felt guilt running through my body as I realized there were still two more hours left of daylight. On Thursday, it also rained, but this time I just decided to get ready for bed early and call it a night. Again it cleared up, but I was already in my pajamas, so I was feeling a little less guilt. This is when I got a text message from Tim letting me know he was working out at Edgewater Park. I looked at the clock, looked at his text message, looked at the clock again and then re-read his text message. Within ten minutes I was on my way to Edgewater to go biking. I just didn't think I could handle any more biker's guilt (I was raised Catholic, can you tell?).

Last night as I was biking around I was able to bike over to Wendy Park which is part of Whiskey Island. What an incredible little untapped area in Cleveland. It's hard to find, but it is worth it when you get there. Check out this website for more information on Whiskey Island and Wendy Park. I actually found a way to bike there from my house, and I couldn't be more excited. By the way, excitement always trumps guilt.

Wings With A Healthy Twist

I have decided to start eating healthier. Unfortunately eating healthier includes cutting back on the good stuff. However a Sportygrrl can not live on lean cuisine and light beer alone, so I went to the Winking Lizard (WL) in Independence for Wings. I present to you Wing Ranking System Part 2.

Every Monday and Tuesday, which is how often I used to eat wings, the WL has wing night where the wings go for 35 cents apiece. The bad thing about wing night is that the wings are always overcooked. I ate wings on a non-wing night once and the difference was huge. On non-wing night you get fresh wings with fresh sauce. I actually asked a friend who used to work there why they tasted so much better on non-wing night. She said often times the wings are sitting under a heat lamp or they have to re-cook them. this was exactly how the wings tasted: overcooked and dry. The ironic part is that we had to wait over a half an hour to get wings that were overcooked and barely had any sauce on them, and the sauce is of course the best part of the WL experience. Everyone knows, or at least you do now, that you don't go to WL to eat chicken, you go there to eat the sauce. The wings there aren't all that jumbo and they tend to break, which always disturbs me, but I blame it on the overcooking and not the fact that the wings aren't fresh. If that were the case, I would have a hard time going there, so I must continue to tell myself it is due to overcooking. On this particular venture we ordered five of each of these sauces: spicy garlic, caribbean, cajun and thai. My personal favorite is the spicy garlic, but all of these sauces are great. If had to rank WL on sauce alone, they would get four wings out of four wings. Unfortunately you have to rate the whole meal, and on this particular wing night, I would only give the experience two wings out of four wings. I also think I am giving up on wing night. It is worth the extra quarter per wing to get fresh wings with more sauce. I can afford it now that I am allowing myself only one beer per wing sitting, which is the healthy twist part of the meal.

Quick recap: Winking Lizard wings on wing-night are not good, but the sauce is always good. If you want good chicken you don't go to Winking Lizard, you go to Barberton.

From Richmond To Barberton

This post is dedicated to my Aunt Mary who is nice enough to check my blog all the way from Richomond Virginia. My dad relayed to me that my Aunt Mary will be coming into town to stay at a bed and breakfast in Barberton Ohio, or Cleveland+ as many people now refer to Barberton. If you know anything at all about this area you were probably as surprised as I was when I heard the words bed and breakfast and Barberton in the same sentence. I decided to do a little detective work because I don't actually believe there is a bed and breakfast in Barberton. Keep in mind when you click on Barberton attractions, the only two things listed are Charger Lanes and Magic City Lanes, the two bowling alleys in town. Quite simply, it's an older quiet city, except when my aunt comes into town because at that point it picks up, and the local Sokol Club (no website available) doubles its annual revenue. Actually there are three things to do in Barberton: bowl, drink and eat chicken. If you aren't familiar with Barberton Chicken, I advise you to read this link. While I found a lot on the chicken using my internet detective work, I am still unable to find a bed and breakfast in Barberton. Unless of course you count passing out in a booth at the Sokol Club and then walking to Hopocan Gardens for some chicken as a bed and breakfast. In that case, count me in and let them know I want extra hot sauce.

Have Bike Rack. Will Travel.

Last Thursday we put the bike rack on the back of my car and decided to try some new routes. Our first trip out was to the Erie Canal Towpath that runs from Akron to Cleveland. This path was really fascinating because you follow the canal, which is mostly dried up now, on the same path the mules used to pull the barges. While we had great aspirations for the towpath, it gets really freaking hot in the Ohio sun, so we didn't go the whole way. On Sunday we hit the road again and went to Elyria to ride the North Coast Inland Trail which takes you to Oberlin. While we had great aspirations, it gets really freaking hot in the Ohio sun, and drinking most of the night before at Mindy's pool party didn't help much either, so we turned our dehydrated selves around vowing to return. Eventually I will give up beer and it will cool down, though I guess if I am giving up beer, it will probably be a cold day in hell. That would be a fun bike path too!

Good Advice

Last week, my girlfriend received an e-mail from Cleveland+ about the opportunity to explore Cleveland with the chance of even winning tickets to go there. This seemed so inviting we decided to actually see this city of Cleveland we had heard so much about. On the advice of Cleveland+ we packed our Saturday full of Cleveland activities.

On Saturday morning we decided to do the Bridge and Subway Tour on the Veterans Memorial Bridge, which is only a few blocks from my house. This free tour allows people to explore the old streetcar routes in Cleveland. You start out by going underground to see the old subway stops, watch a historical movie on streetcars in Cleveland, and then walk all the way across the bridge to the other side of Superior on the lower level-the same route the streetcars used to take. As you can imagine the views of the city were spectacular, and a little scary as you are walking over the Cuyahoga River on a thin grate with a piece of plywood. I have a "small" fear of heights, so needless to say there were a few points where I was holding on for dear life. One of the guides told me it was completely safe, and that he would know because he worked in the Cuyahoga County Engineers office, which relieved me until he told me he worked in accounting. After exiting the bridge on Superior and West 9th we realized we needed water and batteries. Being the complete tourists, we had the digital camera in full swing so we had already run through our first set of batteries. Even though I wanted to get batteries at the porn store on West 9th to get the full feel of Cleveland, we headed to Constantines Market, where we were asked if we were from Cleveland because of the camera hanging by its strap around Julie's neck. We laughed thinking we actually looked like we won a trip to Cleveland (thanks again Cleveland+).

After refilling on batteries, espresso and water, we headed down to explore the flats. I was amazed by how the flats looked like a ghost town on the east bank. Other than Larry Flynt's Hustler Club, there was one bar left and a hair salon.

At points,we were the only people on the whole east bank of the flats and it was the weirdest feeling, however it did give us a lot of room to take fun pictures of the river, the bridges and the scenery surrounding the flats, including the panoramic picture above. We explored the west bank which was much more populated before heading home. We crashed so hard after walking around in the sun in Cleveland for four hours, but we knew we had to re-group because the roller derby was just hours away.

Saturday night we made our monthly trek to the North Olmsted Indoor Soccer Complex to meet up with some friends and catch the Burning River Roller Girls in action. Good times and Pabst Blue Ribbon in a tall can were had by all (except Julie who made thundersticks out of her plastic Bud Light bottles).

By Sunday I was exhausted, but I will never forget what a great day I had in Cleveland+, and I would recommend visiting this city to all my friends.

Marketing For Dummies

Last night as I was watching the NBA draft on Tivo*, I heard Julie say: "Where the hell do they think I live?" I looked over at her as she was reading her e-mail and said: "Who?" She then went on to tell me the Cleveland Convention and Visitors Bureau (an extension of Cleveland+) had sent her an e-mail to enter a sweepstakes to win a trip to Cleveland. The Grand Prize included: Two-night accommodations at the Crowne Plaza City Centre Hotel, four tickets to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum Tickets, four Ingenuity Festival One-Day Tickets, four Dew Sports Action Tour 4-Day Tickets, dinner at the House of Blues, and two roundtrip airline tickets on Continental Airlines.

While that package is great, I really think the braintrust behind Cleveland+ should at least start outside of Cleveland proper. Maybe try the suburbs next time. Those of us who live within the city limits, really don't need a flight.

*Watching the NBA draft on Tivo was one of the best sports draft experiences I have ever had. For an event that takes over four hours, I was able to watch the whole thing in less than an hour. I caught every pick and was able to stop for some key analysis and draft fashion, but other than that, I got to avoid all the useless information they dig up to fill up four hours of television.

One Night In The City+One Night In The Country=Day Of Relaxation

This weekend had a little bit of everything. I spent Friday night in Cleveland enjoying the company of old friends while I spent Saturday night in the backwoods of Wooster enjoying the company of new friends. Sunday was spent recuperating from both these events.

On Friday we met friends at The Garage Bar. My friend Alison won a free happy hour, which entitled her to free drinks from 5 pm-9 pm, while her friends were allowed a free drink, though many of us had more than one drink. The Happy Hour lasted much longer than expected as Mindy came up and met us for more drinks after Happy Hour ended. We finished the evening off with dinner and drinks at the Old Angle. We got the wings, and because I was so hungry and a little intoxicated, I would have to rate the wings with five wings out of four, though they most likely should have a three-wing rating.

On Saturday we got up and went canoeing down in Canal Fulton and became one with nature, or at least ran into a lot of nature with our poor rowing. After canoeing we headed to a country home located on 27 acres out in Wooster. We spent the night cooking out, drinking beer out of a can and sitting around a bonfire. It was a true country night.

On Sunday I walked into my house and vegged out on my couch for most of the day. In the apartment below me, my brother was doing the same thing. Now that we are all rested up, I am taking Mark to his first Taco Tuesday tonight at Lincoln Park Pub. It is a rite of passage if you live on the west side of town. After tonight his life will no longer be the same, or at least he will now know where to get cheap tacos and drink cheap mexican beer. Same difference.

The Wing Ranking System

Unless you are new to my blog, you know I love wings. I cant help it. They call out to me, and I consider myself a connisseur of different types of wings and sauces. I have decided to have a little fun with one of my favorite indulgences and create the wing ranking system. Whenever I go out for wings, I will rank them on a four-wing scale with four wings being the highest rating.

Last night we went to the Sports Inn on State Road. Yeah...I had never heard of it before either, but everytime I pass this bar, they are marketing their "Jumbo Wings" on the sign outside. Before even going there, I prepped myself for what might be in store by calling and asking about the sauces (I didn't want to waste my time going there if they had a bad selection of sauces). The woman who answered the phone rattled off sauce after sauce, so I was intrigued. The bar itself was filled with mostly regulars, and even though it is called the Sports Inn, there is only one TV in the corner to watch sports on. I wasn't there to watch sports, so this didn't matter to me. I was there to eat wings. The menu boasted that the wings were "Voted Cleveland's Best Wings" though it didn't say who did the voting, so I wasn't sure I could trust it. We decided to get a sample of the sauces, so we ordered 4 different kinds of wings: cajun, hot, hot ranch and parmesean garlic.

While I will not be ranking service in this blog, it is good to point out that it took us 40 minutes to get our food, and there was only one server for the tables and bar patrons. Also we never got plates or a pop that was ordered. Nonetheless, when the wings arrived, some of them were piping hot and some were room temperature which seemed odd. You could tell the wings had been overcooked because they were quite dry. I also didn't like the way they put the sauce on the wings. Some of the wings had no sauce and other wings were swimming in sauce. It looked like the cook just threw the sauce on randomly as they were being shipped out of the kitchen. Of the different selections, I liked the hot ranch followed by the cajun which had both a dry rub and wet sauce on it. The hot wings were bland and the parmesean garlic wings were too much. These wings were sitting in garlic butter and then topped with a mound of parmesean and then a mound of minced garlic. It was hard to even find the wings at first in the bowl. On top of all this, they came only with blue cheese but no celery and to me celery is one of my favorite parts. By the looks of the place, there weren't a lot of signs of fresh vegetables, so perhaps they didn't even have celery to serve.

Given the total package of the wings and our expectations, I am giving the wings at the Sports Inn 1.5 wings out of a total of 4 wings. They were much too dry for my taste, the meat didn't seem that fresh and the sauce didn't cover some of the wings. On the bright side, the beer was cold.

Writers Block

Every year about this time, I get writers block. It isn't that I don't have things to write about-this past week alone I have kept myself busy with biking, going to Pride, Father's Day activities, dogwalks through the Metroparks and a fun night downtown, including dinner at Fat Fish Blue. There is something about this time of year, where I just don't get motivated to write. I think it is because it is my "off-season." As a sports fan, June through August is my off-season because there is very little going on in the world of sports to write about. I am not a big baseball fan, so I will watch what the CAVS do in the off-season to improve, but other than that I am sports-free for the next couple months, or so I thought... I checked my e-mail this morning and got this message: "Your Fantasy Football League is ready for 2007." So much for the off-season.

Dear Sports Fans Outside Of Cleveland,

Greetings from Cleveland! I wanted to take this time to let everyone outside of Cleveland know that normally Cleveland sports team are much better losers than what the CAVS showed last night in San Antonio. I feel the CAVS misrepresented so many years of heartache by getting blown out in Game 2 of the NBA Finals. It is not normal for us to go down by so much so quickly. Normally we keep the big game close and then blow it in the end. Please see: the fumble, the drive, the shot and the blown save.

How I Spent My Time In Between CAVS Games

From Kenny Chesney going home with me to biking through the metroparks, the three days in between CAVS games were jam-packed.


After the game on Thursday we bar hopped around Lakewood where we ended the night carrying home a life-size cut-out of Kenny Chesney. When my friend saw the cut-out by the DJ booth she told me she wanted it, so I decided to slide it out the window into the bushes to get on our way out. Operation Kenny Chesney was successful, and it began quite an eventful weekend.

A couple months ago, I took a personality quiz that told me I didn't appreciate art. After this weekend I scoff at that quiz. On Friday we met some friends for dinner at Momocho, where we got the margarita and guacamole samplers before heading off to Just Art. Just Art was a show curated by one of my best friends during the Tremont Art Walk. Just Art benefited Greater Cleveland Community Shares, which is an organization close to my heart because of all the work they do for non-profit organizations in Cleveland. On Saturday we headed south to attend the Columbus Art Festival. After the festival, I ate authentic ethiopian for the first time in my life. I am not one to shy away from most foods, so it was a fun experience. After dinner, we took advantage of being in a different city and went to the Columbus roller derby. On the drive home we decided we were craving wings, but it was too late to do anything about our craving.

On Sunday morning our craving was taken care of when we decided to have Sunday brunch at the Winking Lizard. Thankfully we beat the church crowds there. After some wings and beer (pictured), I went home to clean and then headed out for a 10-mile bike ride at the Metroparks. Apparently the best time to bike is right before a CAVS game because there were very few people on the bike path. Even though I tried to keep myself busy in anticipation of Game 2, the result for the CAVS was still the same. I am looking forward to game 3, but I don't think I will be nearly as busy in between games.