Showing posts with label phrase of the day. Show all posts
Showing posts with label phrase of the day. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Beer Muscles

You know when you are drinking and you think you can do anything? If you don't, let me tell you a little secret about myself: there have been times when beer has impaired my judgment and I thought I could do whatever I wanted. I know this is hard to believe, but follow me on this one. There is a term called "Beer Goggles" which means that after drinking enough beer, someone actually looks more attractive to you. I want to take this time to introduce you to my new term: "Beer Muscles". From here on out the definition of Beer Muscles is going to be: After having several drinks, you think you can lift anyting in front of you. Let me give you an example:

Two nights ago our new tenants (who will be blogged about very soon) began moving into our rental property, which is in the back half of our house. We knew there was a moving truck coming and we knew they owned a lot of heavy stuff, yet we still decided to have happy hour after work. When they arrived at about 8 p.m. that night, I will admit to not being completely sober. I will also admit that at this time I thought I could lift whatever I wanted out of this truck with very little help. The contents of the truck included full dressers, bed frames, bins of books, mattresses and exercise equipment, and I moved as much of it as I could. I couldn't believe how much weight I was able to lift. All the sudden that gym membership was paying off, or maybe it was the beer. I kept lifting and attributed my strength to the gym membership and not the beer. I was wrong.

Flash forward 48 hours later. My arm muscles are sore. Very sore. My arms are barely able to type out this blog. I had trouble putting my shirt on this morning. Even worse...I will have trouble lifting my beer tonight.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Dem On Dem Violence

"Dem on Dem Violence" is the term I coined yesterday after watching a staunch Obama supporter harass a staunch Clinton supporter. The Clinton supporter was simply holding a Hillary sign at an Obama rally. Can't we all just get along, and save all this harassment until we have to fight the real enemy in November?

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Word Of The Day

I have come up with a new word. This new word is: Resolutioners. Please see my definition and story below:

resolutioners \REZ-O-lush; IN-erz\, Noun: people who make a resolution after New Years to lose weight and then go to the gym only to annoy the hell out of the people who have been there for months.

I went to the gym yesterday and was surrounded by "resolutioners." They were using my normal machines or at least attempting to use these machines while I had to stand by patiently waiting for them to figure out they didn't like that machine. Once I was able to get on and begin my work out, they would interrupt me, and ask me how the machine next to me works. Who interrupts someone who is in the middle of a workout, sweating and listening to music on their earphones? At first I just gave quick instructions, but then as this woman next to me began to look like she might hurt herself, I actually stopped working out to show her in more detail. After a minute, she walked away anyway. Luckily I found this article from 2004 that did research on the average length of New Years Resolutions. The results were that most people didn't follow through for more than 17 days. I am hoping this still appplies to this year, or I might just let more people get hurt on the machines I use.